Jonathan Creek (extract) Season 1 Episode 1

Maddy Magellan
Do a trick for me.

Jonathan Creek
I beg your pardon.

Maddy Magellan
Something from your repertoire.

Jonathan Creek
I don’t do tricks.

Maddy Magellan
You invent them. You know all about them. Come on. What do they call it? Close-up magic?

Jonathan Creek
You got tissue in your bag?
[Maddy offers Jonathan a tissue. He takes it.]
Think of … a well-known city.

Maddy Magellan
Constantinople.

Jonathan Creek
[Jonathon takes the tissue writes ‘Constantinople’ on it. He screws the tissue into a ball. He puts the tissue into his hand. He rests his hand on the table in front of him.]
Put your hand on mine. Now concentrate hard … on Constantinople.

Maddy Magellan
Right.

Jonathan Creek
VERY hard.
[Jonathon opens his hand, the tissue has vanished]
Now lift up that relish tray.
[Maddy lifts the relish tray. The tissue is underneath. She opens its and we see the word ‘Constantinople’]

Maddy Magellan
That is… How did you do that?

Jonathan Creek
You don’t want to know, believe me.

Maddy Magellan
How did you do it?

Jonathan Creek
It’s mind numbingly banal.

Maddy Magellan
Tell me. I have to know.

Jonathan Creek
I set it up because people always ask me. When I dropped my fork on the floor earlier on, I grabbed a tissue out of your bag, put it in my pocket. When you went to the toilet, I gave it to the waiter, asked him to write down whatever you said, stick it under the relish tray, bring it to the table. The first tissue I threw over your head so fast you didn’t see it.

Maddy Magellan
That is mind numbingly banal.

Jonathan Creek
Thank you.